A year ago today: but still legal

It was a year ago today that Tod and I were legally married in California, San Francisco to be exact (see the main pic on the blog). Many questioned why we did that, and why we went to such as expense to do so, but to us, the answer was simple: we wanted to be legally married somewhere. Oh sure, we had our lovely commitment ceremony a few years ago in our back yard, but that was only a gesture towards what we wanted as a couple, not the real deal.
“But isn’t that enough?” some would ask. And our response was NO! It wasn’t.
When I first came out, the comment that was thrown back at me by various folks was “don’t you want to be married and have children?” Well, now I am married and I have kids, so those homophobic stereotypes need to be put to rest. Some have said that we didn’t need to do this since it wouldn’t be recognized in Michigan, and those critics have also said that we wasted time and money on something that wasn’t going to fly.

But you know what? It did fly, and we’re still married.

So to all those that said we shouldn’t get married by supporting Prop 8 in California, I say a big FUCK YOU!

To itemize my FUCK YOU! list here are my shout outs:

• Mormons (a double FUCK YOU! after you are dead and buried, sent to all you and your wives!) More on them here, I hope they do track back. http://www.mormon.org/mormonorg/eng/
• Knights of Columbus and the Catholic Church in general. May your pancake breakfasts be epic fails.
• Sarah Palin. Oh, I am soooo sorry you left office. You were such a poster child for all this marriage controversy.
• Carrie Prejean, the FORMER Miss California, it’s an opposite !UOY KCUF
• To that poor restaurant owner somewhere in Hollywood who was caught supporting Prop 8 but had a mostly LGBT clientele. You can cry foul, but we know what you did, and we’ll take our money elsewhere. FUCK YOU. No tip either.
• To all the Black people that voted for this.
• To all the White people that voted for this.
• To all the other colors of folks out there that found it too hard to accept a world that was changing and that love conquers all.
• And lastly, to the California Supreme Court. It’s not quite a FUCK YOU; it’s more of a WHAT THE FUCK??? You had the chance to stand up to there bullies, but you didn’t You tossed a bone to the LGBT community in honoring those of us who were married, and denied the rest of the world a chance to do so by upholding Prop 8. I am happy that I am still married somewhere, but continue to wonder what it means to this day.


I was brought up in a home that respected marriage and showed me as a child what true love was. I hope to bring that to my two kids and to my husband each day. And if you don’t like it… I have two words for you.